Free Advice: On Falling in Love-Part Two

Do I love you because you're beautiful, or are you beautiful because I love you?

~Rodgers and Hammerstein, Cinderella

Do you see a young woman or an old hag?

I had a teacher once, who could easily be described as "unattractive". Her stringy, dishwater blond hair and acne-scarred skin was what I saw when we first met. As I got to know her as the patient, interested, compassionate and caring individual she was, I became aware of how beautiful her blue eyes and broad smile were. She was lovable. Not for what she looked like but for the very essence of who she was.

It seems to me that being lovable has very little to do with how one views themselves but rather how one views others.

I'm no doctor and I'm sure any shrink out there would have issues with my free advice, but at the risk of sounding harsh, we all carry around emotional baggage. That was then. This is now. Recognize that we all have faults, accept them and get over them.

Now is the time to be lovable by nurturing your very own essence.

Being More Lovable

1. Be nice to people
2. Apologize sincerely if you hurt someone's feelings
3. Accept your intrinsic flaws - they're really not going anywhere.
4. Recognize your strengths - exercise them - who knows what could happen?
5. Listen...to people, music, stories, the wind
6. Laugh a lot
7. Relax. Believe me, you're not going to self-destruct if your cupcakes look like hell.
8. Strive to create a home environment of peace and harmony
9. Appreciate your blessings in life
10. Accept your body and beauty as precious. It could be worse.

Leo Buscaglia, PhD was a popular professor, author and lecturer known as "Dr Love". Back in the eighties, I heard a quote of his that continues to resonate with me. It goes (sort of) like this..."So, you've got fat thighs. So what? Chances are, there is a fat thigh lover out there just waiting to meet you."  True enough.  Love: Part 3