Coming to America 8

Wheels:
Nursing has always has always held a certain charm for me as... a) You can always get a job and, b) You can always work overtime if you need extra money. It’s not uncommon for a nurse to calculate the number of shifts vs. the dollar amount of what it would take to purchase a little sumpin'-sumpin'. It’s just our way.

Hospital and unit orientation was finished and I started working on the 3pm to 11pm shift. Overtime shifts were not hard to come by so I would frequently work 16-hour shifts “doubles” in order to save for my down payment.

Within a few weeks, I had the cash in hand and called Mr. Bittner to tell him. Enthusiastically, he replied, "Go find yourself a car!” Easier said than done. Since I didn’t have a car, I didn't have a way to go find one. I thanked him for his help but before I hung up the phone, he asked “Do you have a way to get out and find a car?" Not only was he kind, he was psychic. “No, sir” I replied. Mr. Bittner then offered up his son, Danny to me. Danny was a salesman for a used car dealership. He told me that his son would call me and arrange to pick me up and take me to his car lot the upcoming weekend.

On Saturday morning, a very handsome Danny came by as arranged and brought me to his dealership. He started his sales pitch in the show room. The cars inside were so shiny and new but a lot more expensive than what I could afford. “Your Dad told me that I can only spend $4,000.00 – including tax, title and license” I said. With that, an obviously dejected Danny walked way into the back lot. It was there that he introduced me to a baby blue 1979 Ford Pinto with racing stripes, standard transmission and no air conditioning.

Danny: “$4000.00 even.”
Me: “No, I don’t think so, I need A/C”
Danny: “OK, I’ll throw in after-market A/C”
Me: “Yeah but your Dad said I could only spend a total of $4000.00”
Danny: “OK, let me cut you a deal for $3500.00”
Me: “Thanks but I don’t know how to drive a standard."
Danny: “I’ll tell you what, you buy this car and I will come over to your place every day for a week, take you back here and teach you how to drive a stick.”
Me: "A what?"
Danny: (perplexed) "A stick - a car with standard transmission."
Me: “OK”

Tragically, Ford Pintos were known to explode after minor rear end collisions and thousands of people were killed or severely injured as a result. A national inquest had been in progress for several years and if I had thought to watch the nightly news or pick up a newspaper and read the headlines on occasion, I too would have known about this serious problem. I don't think that Danny was intentionally putting me in harm's way as I doubt he had watched the news or picked up a newspaper in a while either. He was just 'moving the inventory' and was most likely was encouraged to get rid of the Pintos.

Remaining clueless, I excitedly accepted the terms of our deal.   Part 9: Stylin' in My Pinto

Coming to America 11

Blue's Swan Song
Let me begin by saying that "Blue" (my 1979 Ford Pinto) and I were together for four good years. Sure, we had our good days and bad days and there were times that I considered trading him in for a newer model but we were together for the long haul.

It was in the summer of '84 at the height of rush hour traffic and every bit of 100 degrees fahrenheit. I had acclimated to the Dallas heat (as air conditioning was something other people had) and I my perception of merging onto Central Expressway was now a challenge and kind of fun. For several days leading up to Blue's final hours, I could have sworn there was a jet engine flying overhead. In fact, I remember pulling over and looking up on occasion. The roar was actually Blue's Swan Song. The tow-truck driver just shook his head as he gloomily looked at Blue and said, "Lady, cut your losses". I took that to mean that Blue was 'gone'.

Oh, there have been many other cars after Blue went to the great scrapyard out there somewhere...sportier, fancier and faster models , but not one of them earned themselves a name.

Coming to America 10

"Blue"

As a miserable and lonely Dallas newcomer, I had a way to get around town now with my new best friend, "Blue". Cab drivers were so yesterday. My unimaginatively named Ford Pinto possessed many characteristics of a best friend... he was somewhat reliable (and even if he wasn't - I refused to see it), was always there for me and wasn't embarrassed or shy about coughing, stuttering, gagging, squealing and occasionally (ahem) farting.

Initially, Blue and I experienced a few 'getting to know you' challenges.

To this day, mastering the art of gear-shifting was never my strong suit. I've never understood why anyone would want a car with standard transmission. Too much to think about while you're trying to drink a cup of coffee, smoke a cigarette and apply eyeliner all while travelling at 40 mph in the city was almost an impossibility.

Blue was a 'no frills' sort of car and was not taking to the "after-market" air-conditioner very well. This proved to be a wee bit of a problem in the spring, summer and fall of Dallas, Texas.

I soon learned that when the AC was turned on, Blue would 'die' at the most inopportune times -during heavy traffic, while downshifting or as we were perched on a steep incline. In fear of our lives, I chose to drive without AC for the rest of Blue's life and just let my hair go it's naturally frizzy self.

Blue could also be a little 'sluggish' and this would prove to be problematic for us.
In the 80's, Central Expressway, (Dallas' main thoroughfare) was designed in such a way that traffic lights were installed at the entrance ramps.
Imagine this... we are at a full stop on the very short entrance ramp. Suddenly, the light turns green. With full foot force, I would put Blue's 'pedal to the metal' in anticipation of accelerating from 0 mph to 70 mph (within say... 30 seconds) so that we could merge onto the most inanely designed and dangerous expressway in the world. Blue was never up to the challenge but we would eventually reach 70 mph. Judging by the cacophony of horn honking, my fellow Dallasites were not amused. I would like to report getting shot some dirty looks and being able to read mouthed expletives from scornful faces but... remember the Ford Pinto's reputation for rear end collision explosions? My eyes were glued to the rear-view mirror, in anticipation of "The Big Bang". Part 11: Blue's Swan Song